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Thyden Gross and Callahan LLPCounselors and Attorneys at Law

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FATHERS’ RIGHTS
NOT JUST EVERY OTHER WEEKEND

This is about fathers' rights law, and protecting the best interests of your children. It provides information, news and comments on laws, cases and strategies for life as a single father and winning your custody, access or child support case.

Archive for the ‘Emotions’ Category

Those Winter Sundays

Wednesday, March 4th, 2015

by Robert Hayden

Sundays too my father got up early
and put his clothes on in the blueblack cold,
then with cracked hands that ached
from labor in the weekday weather made
banked fires blaze. No one ever thanked him.

I’d wake and hear the cold splintering, breaking.
When the rooms were warm, he’d call,
and slowly I would rise and dress,
fearing the chronic angers of that house,

Speaking indifferently to him,
who had driven out the cold
and polished my good shoes as well.
What did I know, what did I know
of love’s austere and lonely offices?

Negative Effect of Divorce on Children

Tuesday, December 31st, 2013

A new survey by Netmums.com, that included 1,000 parents and 100 children in the U.K., found the following results about the impact of divorce:

Children

  • 39% hid their feelings from their parents
  • 20% said it was no use talking to their parents who were too wrapped up in themselves
  • 14% said they couldn’t be honest about their feelings with their parents
  • 33% said they were devastated by divorce
  • 13% blamed themselves

Parents

  • 77% said their kids were coping fine
  • 10% said their kids were relieved
  • 5% were aware that kids blamed themselves

The conclusions are that most  parents are not aware of the negative impact divorce has on their children and should take extra care to assure the children it is not their fault.

Another Post Divorce Father’s Day

Thursday, June 17th, 2010

Christopher Perry, at CNN.com writes about his painful conversation five years ago with his five and seven year old sons that he and mom were not going to live together any more.  The seven year old tells him “It’s going to be ok.”  The divorce, however, was less than cordial.

Perry tells of the tears, frustrations, laughter, joys, happiness and awe with his children as each Father’s Day ticks off the years.  At the third year, the youngest asks him when he is moving back.

Now after five years, he realizes that it really is going to be ok.

Dad-O-Matic

Thursday, February 12th, 2009

Dad-O-Matic, a new website by Chris Brogan with other contributors, is about parenting ideas from dads.  It contains articles about being a father and a father’s toolbox where you can submit helpful sites, gadgets, tips, comments and the like.

Today’s article by Brogan is about reentry into your family’s life after a business trip.

He advises that you put down the cellphone and reconnect on a big level.  Take them out to dinner.  Reconnect deep and give them what they want, not what you want.  He also suggests you look for the good things instead of complaining about the little things.

Being a Child of Divorce May Help Obama

Thursday, January 22nd, 2009

Barack Obama has shown us not only that a black American can grow up to be President, but a child of divorce can also grow up to be President.   Obama may have learned some qualities from his childhood that can help him as President.

Jill Brooke, First Wives World Editor, has written an article for The Huffington Post noting that “Most divorces require negotiation, compromise and agreeing to disagree. You learn the importance of being reserved and reflective vs. being rash. And why perhaps he likes being No Drama Obama.”

She quotes Don Gordon, an Ohio University Professor, Don Gordon, who says that Obama has likely learned the quality of resilience from being a child of divorce.  “Being president is a piece of cake compared to going through a divorce,” he said.  “This resilience serves well in dealing with lengthy stressful situations.  They can tough it out no matter how bad it gets.”

Worry

Friday, October 17th, 2008

Worry, stress and anxiety are common human emotions.  People will find something to worry about even when times are good.

When going through a divorce or other legal proceeding concerning conflicts about children, you will find many things to worry about, and you will have good reason to worry.  But instead of  worrying about your problems, try worrying at your problems.  Instead of letting your mind be consumed with worrying about how bad the situation is, you should concern yourself with what you can do to solve the problems.

Outline your problems in writing.  It helps you to focus clearly.  Then destroy these notes so they are not used against you by the other side.

Why Alec Baldwin Hates Divorce Lawyers and Judges

Monday, September 22nd, 2008

After an eight year custody battle with Kim Basinger, Alec Baldwin has harsh words for judges and lawyers reports ABC News.

“I don’t care if the judges and the lawyers die of heart attacks in the process of getting their job done. They are corrupt, inefficient, lazy, stupid — they’re the most God-awful people,” Baldwin said.

Baldwin’s new book, “A Promise to Ourselves: A Journey Through Fatherhood and Divorce,” hits stores tomorrow.

“The judges are like pit bosses in Vegas casinos,” says Baldwin.  “Their job is to make sure everybody stays at the table and keeps gambling.”

Baldwin and Basinger have had 91 court proceedings so far, and about $3 million in legal costs.  That’s enough to make anyone mad at the system.

Country Songs We Wished We’d Written

Thursday, May 22nd, 2008

Every Other Weekend
by Reba McEntire and Kenny Chesney

Every Other Friday
It’s toys and clothes and backpacks
Is everybody in?
Ok lets go see dad
Same time in the same spot
Corner of the same old parking lot
Half the hugs and kisses
There are always sad
We trade a couple words and looks and kids again
Every Other Weekend

Men Take Divorce Harder than Women

Friday, May 9th, 2008

Divorced or separated men were six times more likely to have depression as married men according to a 10-year study by Statistics Canada.

Women, on the other hand were only 3.5 times more likely to be depressed after a marital break-up than were their counterparts who were still in a relationship, according to the study.

“Men appear to take the separation harder, “the report concluded.

The study found that both men and women had higher odds for depression in the two years following the end of a marriage or common-law relationship, when compared with people who stayed with their spouses.

How long does the sadness last? Most people who experienced depression in the post-relationship period were no longer depressed four years after the break-up.

 
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